I just know.

I wanted to say that I never really imagined and expected that it is possible to be this happy. But I can’t. Because I know. I have worked hard on knowing deep in my heart that I will be this happy. I have prayed for a faceless someone who will be by my side as we both grow. A faceless someone who isn’t afraid of how much I can expand my horizon because he, too, isn’t limiting. I have asked for a faceless someone whom I don’t need to hide my wounds from because he sees me as beautiful as I see myself. Finally, happy tears. Finally, I don’t feel the need to pretend to be somebody I’m not or do things way way out of who I really am just to be “happy” or should I say make the other person happy. This time, I am just me, loving fearlessly. Now, I remember. I am what I was before I was not. I’m just so grateful that I get to heal a big part of myself and was able to empty spaces for new great things to come. I just knew I had to let go of things that was not doing me good anymore and just keep the lessons with me. I learned to embrace the pain, the traumas, the imperfections and accepted that they served their purpose in my life. Finally, I don’t get to be put in the gray area. Now, it is crystal clear. I am loved. I am fearless. I am happy. So happy.